Marital Experience of Mr and Mrs. Joseph Owoeye
Presenter: Oluwafemi Ezekiel
Presenter:
Join me and welcome Mr and Mrs Abayomi Owoeye to the Original Plan Online interview Platform
Presenter:
Mr. Owoeye, How did you meet your wife?
Mr. Owoeye:
We have known ourselves for long…lived in same neighborhood, attended the same church. We were in the youth fellowship, though friends but not really so close.
So we met in the church.
Presenter:
How did you know both of you were meant to be husband and wife? (question for both)
Mr. Owoeye:
The foundation is knowing how God speaks. For me, one of the way God speaks is through His leading. Praying over the time for a life partner, He directed me. I step up my interaction with her after ‘catching it’. And, I proposed to her on March 23rd, 2003. She gave me a feedback on July 26th, 2003. And it was a “yes”.
All the rest is history today. To God be the glory.
Mrs. Owoeye:
It took me a while, before I could say yes to his proposal, but I said yes because of the conviction I got from God and for his integrity and firmness.
Presenter:
Please, we want you to be Practical Here sir: How did you propose to her? 😀
Mr. Owoeye:
😀😀😀I am very practical person.
Like I said, it was quite easy cos we were friends on talking terms. I stepped my interaction with her based on my leading so as to know some more things about her. Then, the the day came. Met her and told her though I do not need your answer now concerning what I want to tell but will give you time to come back to me. And like a guy now, I told her I would want to marry her. I did not beat about the bush with poems or to start preaching. I dropped my intention straight & comot face oo cos I know we will be going back to school very soon. Thank God, it was a yes.
Presenter:
Both of you knew each other before, from the same church etc.
How was her reaction when you said that sir
Mr. Owoeye:
My wife is a calm & calculated person. She did not jump over the roof on proposing to her. She just smiled & said okay. You know the secret, I disarmed her😃😃
How? By first putting forward that I do not require her to give me an answer now. So, that gave her comfort. I don do my calculation well oo based on my understanding of her. Moreover if God dey my side, everything go surely work out🕺
Presenter:
When your husband proposed to you, was there any of your friends, family who was against it or say something that was not encouraging ma?
Mrs. Owoeye
None, as I did not discuss it with anyone except God that I communicated with, who gave me a back up after fasting n praying and strong confirmation abt the relationship. He showed me things that will happen then and after. Later, I discussed with my very close friend, who encouraged me not to back out Baba’s voice. Since He is leading then I should follow. Thank God today I do not regret my decision.
Presenter:
What is the most difficult challenge of your marriage so far? Mr Owoeye sir
Mr. Owoeye:
Well, though do not see any part as being stressful. We dey enjoy ourselves. The only challenge after the initial familiarization phase was when we started having kids. It came with the burden of coping with them alongside the many activities of my wife & myself. My wife helped me to scale through the phase very well.
Presenter:
Yes Ma, Who apologizes first when you quarrel?
Mrs. Owoeye:
Me initially, but later, the two of us as situation arises.
Presenter:
Even if he offends you ma?
Mrs. Owoeye:
Yes pls, initially, as I said. But , he does if he offends me
Mr. Owoeye:
Just to add.
My wife does, especially at the very early stage. You know the ‘traditional men ego’. Over time, she made me to understand more about the need to say ‘sorry’ when wrong and that it does not make you less of a man or husband. Truly, it is the reality!
Men ooooooo…make we talk to ourselves
Presenter:
Why do you think some marriages crumble?
Mr. Owoeye:
Very many things make marriages fail but will highlight only these 3 fundamentals.
- Faulty Foundation…a marriage not on the foundation on the principles & values Christ is a recipe for failure
- Lack of Trust & Communication..this is the bedrock of agreement between couples. And bible says “Can 2 walk unless they agree”. When out of marriage, wahala go plenty.
- Non-openess to adaptability & adjustment…marriage is a ‘give & take’ experience. If are ‘too big’ to make adjustment or adapt to your marriage demands based on your spouse’s strengths & weaknesses; then that is a danger signal.
Let me quickly add that if all these are quickly identified & addressed at any stage of the marriage, the marriage will sure be heaven on earth.👩❤️👨
Mrs. Owoeye:
Some marriage failed today, due to the reasons below;
- Failure to take issues back to God who originated the institution (marriage).
- Infidelity : Having extra marital affairs.
- Neglecting sexual intimacy.
- Fighting to win due to selfish attitude by either of the partner.
- Loosing respect for each other.
- Inability to exercise God’s own type of love “Agape”.
So many couples today failed to understand that they have not married an angel. If we are Angels, then there should be wedding in heaven. Therefore try to relate with each others as two forgivers
Presenter:
Can you please give your advice to future couples!
Mr. Owoeye:
Marriage is not bad. It is the people in it that determines the experience. As any life endeavour, it demands that we deal in LOVE…love to God, love to ourselves & spouses & children, love to other people around us. If we truly build it on the tripod of LOVE, then it will be enjoyable.
Mrs. Owoeye:
A perfect marriage is just two imperfect people, who refuse to give up on each other.Since marriage does not have duration? Try to dwell with each other with patient , love , trust,understanding and total commitment. Marriage is hard work, fight for it. Your victory is certain, and your home will be heaven on earth.
General Questions From Audience
Audience:
Someone loves you so much and said he wants to spend the rest of his life with you…u like him but u are not so sure if he is the right person and your family members don’t like him…what do u do??
Mr. Owoeye:
Thanks sir/ma.
First is to note that parental consent is very necessary in any relationship. So, if the family members referred to here includes parents then that is the concern. If not, don’t expect everyone to support your choice or decision.
Having said that, you must be convinced that that person is for you by God. Once, you are very sure about that.
Then, take it to him to pull down every obstacles to making His will come to pass in your life concerning the marriage. I am sure if He truly gives the vision then He will make provision.
The reason why you need to engage Him actively at this time is that you will need Him on the journey of your marriage.
Pls note don’t be stubborn or rebellious when advancing your case with your family members.
Just be firm and courageous like the bible says & you will have good success in this case.🙏
Audience:
Can your future husband/wife be seen in another dimension apart from spiritual ,dreams and d likes
Mr. Owoeye:
We need to be wary of caging God & determining how He will speak to you. Bible says God speaks in diverse ways. Just be patient and connected to Him, your Father will speak to you about your request. Don’t act faster than God.
Also, He speaks but many can’t recognise it cos we don’t have relationship with Him. He is not a “Yahoo yahoo” God. Have relationship with Him and He will speak with you. He can confirm it through other means or people. Just stay connected
Audience:
What advice do you have for youth whose parents disapprove their relationship because of inter tribe
Mrs. Owoeye:
Issues like this is common. The parties involved shd pray , in as much as they are sure is God’s leading. His will, will come to past. But nevertheless, dont be rude to your parents. If it does not work out after praying, God has several ways of settling his people. So relax? One with God is majority. You will never Miss the will of God for your life.
Audience:
Question: A sister at the age of 27 saw the will of God for her and went to approach the brother and told him( though that will a great mistake I tink) but after telling this brother he started using all kind of forces on her like commanding her and lots more but this sister is still standing that he is the will of God please at this point wat can she do
Mr. Owoeye:
I am strong believer of prayers. However, the principle is that faith without work is dead. The fact that it is your will does not mean it will a ‘perfect angel’. It means it is the right path to take. In taking that path, you have work to do. If you want pounded yam, God will give you yam & you will the strength and grace of God will make it pounded yam. And if you do not make it well it could pounded yam with koko😃
Follow the principles about relationship…understand the strengths and weaknesses and work on how you will make him a better person. It demands sacrifice, adjustments and adaptation. That you are in a relationship of God’s will does not make you a puppet. Stand up and make God’s will work.
Audience:
Ma, it took u 3 months before u gave a yes. Apart from the prayers and fasting u did, what other things did u consider?
Mrs. Owoeye:
I considered his stand in the Lord, being a born again Christian, dedicated. And also his integrity and firmness as I said earlier.
Audience:
Do u actually get tired of it at some point,I mean sex?
Mrs. Owoeye:
Not really, but not an everyday affairs. U might be tired at times after gone thru a lot of stress for the day, but still the best way to exercise your body, when u got licence for it.
Audience:
Unlike when u were still single, how do u see sex now that u are married,considering how singles see and imagine sexual experience?
Mr. Owoeye:
Brothers and Sisters, when God gives instruction it is for our own good. Ask some that are even married today, they are having issues around sexual experience. Do not put your mind on sex, it comes with him the marriage commitment. Don’t struggle to answer WAEC questions while still in Pry 6. Sex go wan shak you cos of your body changes; but put it to check cos it’s not yet time. That is self control & discipline. Mortify your body. There is no big deal about sex, you will be licensed to experience it when married. Strictly for the married. Just keep to the rule of the game.
Audience:
A brother got engaged to a lady but observed DAT d lady is always coming up with fight. She is not peaceful at all yet d brother prayed and God told him to marry d lady. What can he do?
Mrs. Owoeye:
It means , God brought them 2geda for a purpose. The brother has a lot of task concerning the sister, which must be done with meek spirit and understanding. In order to win the heart of the sister. U must make her undst things abt God with a discussion on how God want us to relate with each other, and finally back it up with prayers.
Audience:
A lady dreamt and saw two prophet in the dream that describe who her husband was and she meet the person after 1 month…being fully conviced he was the one..She later gave the name of the guy to her pastor… And her pastor told her that no.. Given some crucial reasons.. She also gave his name to another pastor.. He also said no.. She shouldn’t marry the guy.. What can she do?
Mr. Owoeye:
We are children in the eyes of our fathers. As I recognize spiritual leadership, I must say we should not transfer the responsibility of decisions of our life to possible ‘prayer merchants’. If you have relationship with God; as true child He will guide you on the way to go.
Everything that comes your way by happening or info from another person must be weighed on the scriptures. Once it fails the WORD TEST, then don’t go for it. Pray to your father, let Him talk to you. At least you will be the one to make the final decision and be accountable for it. Ask for your Father for His will and He will let you know.
Audience:
I know for sure that God speaks to us on choice of live partners, but don’t u think that people use that indiscriminately.
Mr. Owoeye:
Beyond marriage, sure God speaks to us on all issues of live. Our loving Father is interested in all areas of our lives and not only marriage. Have good relationship with Him and He will talk to you.
Yes, people abuse. It is one of the signs of end time.Moreeover, it has always been so even since Bible days..remember the Sorcerer. Magicians etc. They will come in appearance of light but are devil. Pls run away from them. The most potent voice is the one you hear yourself. Let Him speak to you.
Presenter:
Thank you for coming, we really appreciate and we pray that God bless your home. Thank you sir/ma
Next week will be talking on WHY PEOPLE CHANGE AFTER MARRIAGE? that is people who use to be very lovely suddenly change after Marriage and is going to be centered on Singles and Married
Our Guest’s Profile:
Mr. Owoeye:
Joseph Abayomi Owoeye is a B.Sc Accounting, UNILAG/ MBA, Bayero University, Kano. He got married to Alice Olubukola 10 years ago With 3 Kids. He is a Business Development Specialist
Mrs. Owoeye:
Alice Olubukola Yomi-Owoeye an HND Accountancy in Osun State Poly / MBA, LAUTECH. She got married to Joseph Yomi 10 years ago with 3 kids. She is a banker
