Where Are You Going
(Knowing The Fundamentals Of Being Compatible Before You Plug into The Journey of Marriage.)
THE FOUNDAMENTALS OF BEING COMPATIBLE BEFORE PLUGING INTO MARRIAGE
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There are some basic areas where the Bible specifically made it a must for would-be husband and wife, to be strongly compatible, one of such is:We have seen so many relationships that seem to show compatibility only for the marriage to expose the great difference in the two because of the pretense and lie in the relationship and we have seen some marriages that on the face value,nothing ought to have brought the two together because of the difference in the lives of the couple but they turned out to be the best of the couple. The main reason for this is the will of God and accepting it.It is the developer of any software application that knows the computer that will be compatible with the software created,To the users, at times he can guess, and this can lead to the crashing of the system just like we have many crashed marriages today.God created us, He is the one that knows what and who can partner with us to bring His purpose to reality in our lives so, any partner He recommends to us we must accept.When we look at the foundation of marriage from Adam and Eve;
Gen 2:21 ¶ And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;
22 And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.God took a rib from Adam and that created a space in his body, the Bible says in vs twenty-two that it was that same rib that he returned to the space in Adam after forming a woman as a wife out of the rib.The rib God returned to Adam’s life was not bigger or smaller in size to the space from which it was taken. We can simply say the rib was compatible to space where it was taken from.There is always a missing rib in the life of every man and the rib is a woman that will be returned which must be the same in terms of the size of the space created if it is bigger,You may have to quiz it unto space and it will go with a lot of inconveniences, we have some marriages like this, If it is smaller, there will still be a vacuum, that is why we see a big vacuum in a man’s life despite being married.The challenges also affect the lives of women when the right rib is returned to the life of the wrong man, no matter how good the wife can be, the husband will continuously be the wrong husband for her.That is why you will see a naturally good wife with no peace at home with the husband.
The Yoruba will always pray that: ‘OLORUN KO NI JE KI A GBE EKUN ELEKUN’ .that may we never carry a wrong missing rib.As I said earlier, there are some things we emphasize on in the area of compatibility which to me are not necessary especially when the will of God is involvedFor example not marrying a Sister or brother because he/she is from a poor family, if He that created you and knows the end from the beginning is saying that he is His will for you, please go ahead.Tribe and races also do come in when talking of compatibility, to me these are secondary issues.
For the issues and the likes that I stated above, I am not saying we should not consider it, we should seriously look into it for deep consideration on how to cope.Looking for someone who you are 100% compatible in life with may be an illusion, a story only in the film or a fiction.You must be ready to change what you can change and adjust to what you can adjust too in your relationship. To see the differences in a relationship and to make a decision, your definition of love should not be LOVE IS BLIND.You need to open your eyes wide enough to see what you need to see for you to make the right decision.There are certain gaps in our life that is meant to be fill by our partners which the issue of compatibility should be played down,if a lousy man is saying he will not marry a very gentle sister because she is too quiet may not be reasonable enough because God may bring her to his life to compliment his weakness of being too lousy.In summary, as good as compatibility may be in a relationship, the most important thing is the will of God, ability to see the differences in the two of you and having the assessment of such differences and agreeing on how to cope or adjust if he or she is the will of GodGod bless you allI don’t know the modality to be adopted for question and answer but while you prepare for this, my wife will make her contributionProfessor FeyiThanks MD and God bless you richlyPermit me to share few slides and speak few words